Youkai Girl at the Gate

[0:00] (Kyouko) Watch what you say, someone is listening
Say it louder when it's echoing!
Come out and play if you're coming my way
Let's have fun on the first day of Spring!

[0:13] (Marisa) Well, that's okay if you're planning to fight
Come on, we've been doing this all night!

[0:20] (Kyouko) [Echo Sign: Mountain Echo Scramble] is sound
Come on, when you guys talk, you should try to be more loud
Enjoy the clear weather and break out in song
(Youmu) She's like the Prismriver sisters and their big crowds

[0:33] (Kyouko) If you got news, then come and talk about it
I'll spread it round to everyone, so never doubt it
Echo it back and forth
(Marisa) Oh, now I get it
That's why you're being loud

[0:43] (Kyouko) Well of course I am! Did you think I'd turn on my existence?
My [Echo Sign]! This is how I show my feelings with [Power Resonance]!

[0:57] (Sanae) Oh, I see! You're a Yamabiko Youkai, aren't you?
Hey, "Yahoo"!
(Kyouko) I see that you know the game! [Charged Yahoo!]

-Kyouko defeated-

[1:23] Looks like I lose in a formal duel
What do you need? That's part of the rules ~

[1:30] (Reimu) ... Have you seen the ghosts that people are reporting?
(Kyouko) There was a meeting about that issue this morning
Nazrin told us to send you guys to the cemetery
(Marisa) Isn't that the one from the Tengu's Zombie story?

[1:43] (Sanae) I read that one. Doesn't she have no memory?
(Youmu) Ah, I didn't. Could you explain what is a "zombie"?
(Marisa) A corpse that lives and eats the brains of the living people!
(Kyouko) She's out past the temple

[1:55] (Youmu) Someone who is dead, but still alive is an issue for my mistress
Maybe I should look into this matter so she won't worry from this
(Marisa) That's the plan! Though I heard she doesn't remember something
(Kyouko) Also, we heard earlier that someone was fighting

-girls exit-

Welcome to Youkai Temple

-Kyouko enters. Marisa, Reimu, Sanae, and Youmu enter-

[0:30] (Kyouko) Anupadasuttam, Namusam-
(Marisa) Incoming! We're here on business!
(Sanae) Marisa! She was doing her morning duties!
(Youmu) Well, I see she still tends to make a big mess

-Marisa exits-

[0:55] By the way, my name is Youmu Konpaku
(Sanae) My name's Kochiya Sanae
(Youmu) My condolences for working beside these two
(Reimu) Marisa, you're headed the wrong way!

-Reimu exits-

[1:20] (Sanae) They've mentioned you. So you used to join them?
(Youmu) Yes, but 2 years ago I learned a certain lesson
Well, mistress said to come, so I can help this time
(Marisa) So you're not grounded then?
(Reimu) Hey, we passed the Youkai Shrine!

[2:17] (Kyouko) Hey! Good morning! Wait, that's dangerous!
Why are you swinging sharp objects?!
(Youmu) Well, it's fine. Fairies can be quite annoying
(Kyouko) This temple has a strict ban on killing!

[2:42] (Marisa) By the way, can you pipe down? You're pretty loud
(Kyouko) And deny my own existence?
And by the way, attacking's in the liturgy
So challengers, fight if you want to get by me!

[3:06] (Youmu) A fight, of course. Well, it seems nothing's really changed
The things that can't be cut by my swords are next to none!
(Marisa) Hah, I missed that! Well I guess I'll be joining in
I don't mind a challenge! So why don't we have some fun?

Ghost Lead

[0:00] (Yuyuko) [Dance of the Dead Butterflies -Cherry Blossoms]
(Reimu) This again? Move away!
(Marisa) You're kidding! Cards like this are the best to graze!
(Sanae) Hey, come on guys! Which strategy is safe?
(Reimu) Just back off!
(Marisa) No, keep close to shoot at point blank
(Sanae) I'll just stay right here. This part is manageable

[0:35] (Yuyuko) By the way, what are you looking for?
(Marisa) Ghosts are being weird, don'tcha know?
(Reimu) What she means is that there are divine spirits all over
(Yuyuko) Is that so?
[Nether Sign: Endless Evening Cherry Blossoms]
Well if you beat this, I might say what I know
(Marisa) [Master Spark]! Laser-to-face will always win!
(Reimu) Well, looks like we won. So tell me, what are these?

-Youmu enters-

[1:22] (Youmu) Tea's ready
(Yuyuko) Sorry, but I don't know
That has nothing to do with us
(Reimu) Oh come on!
(Youmu) Reimu? Why are you here today?
(Marisa) I can't believe that this trip was just a bust

[1:45] (Yuyuko) Oh, Youmu! Someone will make a revival
There are no secrets behind the new temple

[1:57] (Youmu) ... Alright then, I suppose I should go
(Yuyuko) Don't forget to bring souvenirs!
(Sanae) So do we... Follow her?
(Marisa) Yeah, I guess
(Youmu) Is this why you three came out here?

[2:20] (Yuyuko) Don't forget, the cemetery is the place
(Reimu) Alright, so much for "we don't know anything"...
(Sanae) I'm confused. Is she helping or something else?
(Marisa) Let's just chalk it up to the weirdness of spring

-girls exit-

[2:43] (Yuyuko) ...Yukari, have you woken up yet?
Looks like we've got a small problem...

Night Sakura of Dead Spirits

-Netherworld-

[0:00] (Sanae) Somehow, I thought this would be harder
Is it alright to come into the Netherworld this way?
(Marisa) Of course. The door is open, ain't it?
(Sanae) Well, it wasn't really. There was space above it
(Reimu) Focus guys

[0:40] Alright, these ghosts are blocking our way. Geez
Let's just start shooting then. I want to finish this today
(Sanae) Can we do that?
(Marisa) Got it! If we can't, blame Reimu!
(Reimu) I don't have to worry, since it's coming from you
(Sanae) You two...

-spirits approach-

[1:33] (Marisa) Reimu, do you see what I see?
Those ghosts that we shot down kinda turned all misty
(Reimu) Yeah, I saw them as well
(Sanae) I think I can sense energy
Coming from the ones that we just shot down
(Marisa) Well, that's just too creepy

-Yuyuko enters-

[2:12] (Reimu) Huh. Let's go beat up these ghosts' boss
(Sanae) Of course you would say that
(Yuyuko) Do we have visitors? Wait right here, I'll go and prepare a pot of tea

-Yuyuko exits-

[2:26] (Sanae) Who's that? She's not like the others
(Marisa) That's cuz she's a phantom. Just think of her as a ghost lady

-Yuyuko enters-

[3:05] (Yuyuko) Alright, you three can now come in
(Reimu) We're just here on business
(Sanae) We need information
(Reimu) So, what are you planning?
(Yuyuko) Who knows? Why don't we duel for it?
(Sanae) Of course it comes to that
(Marisa) Alright, that's the spirit!

Spirit of Avarice

-Sanae enters-

[0:07] (Marisa) Oh, hey there Sanae! What brings you out this way?

(Sanae) Have you seen the spirits that are forming today?

[0:34] (Reimu) So that's what the news was

Hey, didn't this happen a few years back?

(Marisa) I was thinking of the incident before that

We should go check

(Sanae) Where are we going to?

(Marisa) The Netherworld portal

(Sanae) The Netherworld?!

(Marisa) Oh, don't be a baby

(Reimu) It's not such a big deal

Come on, let's go

-on the way-

[0:46] I've got a bad feeling

(Marisa) Yeah, I'm getting one too

Since they're all ghosts

(Sanae) Have you done this before?

(Marisa) Well, I wouldn't say that

The ghosts are new

(Sanae) No, I mean the portal

(Reimu) Oh, that part is easy

It's still open

And Yukari never fixed it after that mess

We can go through

-Youkai Mountain-

[1:14] (Reimu) Why'd we do this at night? The mountain is freezing!

(Marisa) Your fault, armpits

Why don't you two dress more warmly for this weather?

That would do it

(Reimu) It's not just the weather. The spirits aren't helping

(Sanae) I'm doing fine

(Reimu) Anyway, hurry up. Let's finish this quickly

Don't fall behind

Wind God Girl (Bohemian Archive in Japanese Red)

[0:20] (Bunbunmaru) Special Reveal! The Giant Shadow that many have Seen!

Revealed at last: Hisou Tensoku, the giant of steam!

Brought to you by the Moriya Shrine and Genbu Kappa

Here’s some remarks from the miko, Sanae Kochiya!

[0:43] (Sanae) Moriya Shrine apologizes for the disturbance that we’ve caused today

Please be assured that there’s no danger in any way

The robot is like a balloon, and it cannot move from its place on Youkai Mountain

(Aya) Alright then, let’s hear from the Goddess of the Wind!

[1:22] Now Miss Kanako Yakasa: Why is there a giant robot near Moriya?

(Kanako) This is a quick preview of all the things that we can do

We plan to let Gensokyo grow anew

[1:46] (Aya) As residents like me must confess, I don’t think that I really understand

(Kanako) An example of many changes that my partner and I have currently planned

The construct you see behind me is powered by steam and can be moved by anyone

Science and magic can now become like one

[2:11] (Suwako) In layman’s terms, what she wants to do is modernize all of Gensokyo soon

We plan to start by bringing power to everyone

(Aya) Is that course wise? Some people would say that power for all is too dangerous

And there are still some rumors about that Hell Raven with the power of the sun

(Kanako) Oh, I see. That’s not what we mean. We meant things like steam and indoor electricity

It’s time Gensokyo could grasp technology!

-Later at the Moriya Shrine-

[3:28] (Kanako) I think that went well. Now everyone can tell that we mean serious business

(Sanae) That was a disaster. Someone will accuse us of starting an incident

[3:40] (Suwako) Hey, don’t worry. Some people have seen that all of this steam doesn’t hurt a fly

I order you to cheer up at once and enjoy yourself

(Sanae) I promise that I’ll try

(Kanako) All this faith… it seems that Tengu has sent out the news, and her paper’s hardly alone

(Utsuho) Unyu?

(Kanako) And for the last time, you should go home!

-page 2-

[4:04] (Bunbunmaru) –And now we have a missing Youkai: The Hell Raven who responds to “Okyuu”

She was last seen near Youkai Mountain a week ago

Her friend “Orin”, a Hellcat Kasha, has something to say about her missing

“If you see her, tell her to head down. It’s better that way, because Okyuu is slow.

Either that, or just send her to the Hakurei Shrine and get Reimu to contact me

Tell her that this is an order from Satori!”

...

[5:34] (Kanako) … So, Sanae, I just realized you should go and visit Reimu

And while you’re out, you should probably take Okyuu too

(Suwako) Kanako’s too scared to go out♪ You’re in trouble now♪

(Sanae) I suppose I can go solve this

Come on Utsuho, let’s go already

(Utsuho) Unyuu?

Timeline

Illusionary Sputnik Night

-Marisa’s house-

[0:00] (Aya) Marisa! I got those pictures that you wanted

Problem is, I lost some from an accident

(Marisa) Oh well, that is good enough. Let’s see what you got then

I’ll take any pictures that I think would fit in

[0:14] (Aya) Not so fast. So how did my page turn out then?

(Marisa) Why, is there something that you wanted to add?

(Aya) I just thought if you could mention my reporting

Then I’m sure a loyal ally would be so glad

[0:27] (Marisa) So, who’ll be reading it then?

-Aya is explaining-

[0:44] (Aya) There’s an event soon for all the Tengu

We fight to top each other’s papers

So, someone could sell my image

[0:57] (Marisa) Oh, I get it! What should I say?

(Aya) I shouldn’t write the praise myself

(Marisa) Whatever, I got it ~ze!

So, did you come for anything else?

[1:11] (Aya) No, that should be good enough

That Oni’s complaining again

Just make it sound impressive

Oh, you should add the Kappa in

-Girls are editing-

[1:52] (Marisa) Alright, I’ll finish that up

[2:22] So, you’ll print copies for me?

(Aya) A few sets should be easy

How many will you need then?

(Marisa) I guess I can make do with only 3

[2:35] (Aya) Only 3? Who are they for?

(Marisa) One of them is for Akyuu…

I’ll sneak one by Patchouli…

The final one’s for Kosuzu!

[2:49] (Aya) A copy might be misplaced

Who knows which Tengu might find it?

(Marisa) That’s fine, as long as the rest

End up where they would spread the best

[3:02] (Neutral) That was how the #2 commended Aya on her speed

She claimed “She does a good job”, her pace is “extraordinary

The Youkai Mountain ~ Mysterious Mountain

-At Youkai Mountain-

[0:17] (Aya) Looks like you got some poor lighting

Looks like a flash would have helped there

Well, that’s what happens when you take a photo without care

(Hatate) Well, look who’s talking! You’re too far

You can’t focus on where they are

What, can’t you zoom in closer? My power did it there

-Tenshi enters, Iku enters-

[0:34] (Iku) Found you! Eldest Daughter, stop it right there!

(Tenshi) Iku!

You’ll have to defeat me first, you know!

(Aya) Right there! Sanae’s not centered at all!

(Hatate) So what?

(Aya) Are you gonna comment on her hair?

[0:50] (Iku) So be it!

(Tenshi) Wah, Iku’s really mad, but isn’t it so sad that she can’t hit me from over there?

(Hatate) Well, maybe I will do a piece on that!

(Aya) What, after commenting on what she may wear?

(Iku) Oh, I won’t move all too far. After all you’re in range of my attack, isn’t that right?

(Tenshi)… ah, I forgot about that

(Aya) Here, just look at mine

(Hatate) Wait a second, do you see that light?-

-Tenshi, Aya and Hatate are shocked-

-Iku and Tenshi exit-

[1:31] (Aya) Well, looks like those two flew the coop

(Hatate) Come on! Why won’t this thing reboot?!

(Aya) Oh, do you mean to tell me you lost your “technology”?

(Hatate) I didn’t save them to a disk!

(Aya) Well, I guess that means this is it

Look here and weep, for I am the best reporter today

[1:49] (Hatate) It’s blank.

(Aya) Wait, it is the next one

(Hatate) That too…

(Aya) Really? This one?

(Hatate) There’s nothing right there to see!

Looks like your roll got exposed to the light

(Aya) No way!

Come on, you’ve got to be kidding me!

[2:04] Well then, I guess the contest will be best

To settle who is the better reporter, wouldn’t you say?

(Hatate) Yes, that works out perfectly in the end

After all, no one’s out to see it today

So then, don’t go out of print before then, since I plan to beat you officially

(Aya) Hah, it seems that you didn’t learn anything about what makes a proper story!

Bell of Avicii ~ Infinite Nightmare

-By the Sanzu-

[0:00] (Hatate) Gee, an empty river. Is this supposed to frighten me?

I think that you’re losing it

(Aya) Just… wait and see

(Eiki) Oh, so someone has come on their own

Shall I give you judgment?

(Hatate) It’s that Yama! What’s she doing here?

So that’s what you meant?

[0:31] (Eiki) So, I see your purpose is from rivalry

Both of you have too much pride!

Shall I sentence you to burn your work eternally?

(Aya) You lose if you try to hide!

[0:42] The best picture decides the match and

best reporter! So do you have the guts?

(Hatate) This is child’s play! I’ll get the best shot, so just give up!

(Eiki) Add envy to that! You’ll be forced to read each other’s work

(Aya) She’s being serious

In that case, I must go all out right here

So then, get clear!

-Eiki corners Aya-

[1:55] (Hatate) Look out Aya!

(Eiki) Let me make this clear, Shameimaru

We spoke of this last time

Causing incidents intentionally is a major crime

(Aya) Just get a picture! I’ll bear it for a reporter win

I’ve heard all of my sins

(Hatate) … At least you should know, I respected you

Hands off the Tengu!

-Tengu are fighting Eiki-

[2:56] (Hatate) I got mine!

(Aya) It’s time we both get out of here

(Eiki) You can’t run from all your sins!

(Hatate) Don’t look down on us!

(Aya) You should know that the Crow Tengu

Are all as swift as the wind!

-Aya and Hatate exit-

[3:07] (Eiki) Solid teamwork. Perhaps they will learn some tolerance

But it’s still a problem

After all, it’s time their competition happens to commence

-With Aya and Hatate-

[3:19] (Hatate) Did we get away?

(Aya) I think so. Also, thanks for the save

(Hatate) Of course that’s what I’d do

If I took the shot of the Yama there, it’s be of you!

[3:56] Please tell me that’s it for your subjects

(Aya) What, don’t tell me you’re tired from that

(Hatate) Says the one who’s “starting incidents”

Now I get why your stories are fresh

[4:19] Let’s settle this! It’s time to show off who’s the winner

And better reporter

(Aya) So eager to fall. Very well, let’s go back to our start point

(Hatate) Sure you don’t need to go home to develop your “photos”?

All mine are digital

(Aya) Don’t look down on film. I can view them here inside their roll!

Nemesis Stronghold

-Outside the Myouren temple-

[0:35] (Aya) Well this is the big leagues ahead now

So are you sure you don’t want to go back home now?

(Hatate) There is no reason to

(Aya) Is that so? Well, long ago this monk killed a lot of old Youkai

You don’t need to lose your life for news

[1:03] (Hatate) There’s no way you’ll scare me off

I won’t be scared of some old monk who’s still human

(Kyouko) Oh, visitors? Go in

-entering-

[1:15] (Hatate) A Youkai? So then it’s safe

(Aya) Of course. Didn’t you know I was joking?

The monk is a Youkai… or something

-leaving-

[1:59] (Hatate) Okay, that monk’s weird. But seriously

I’ve yet to see something I’d take seriously

(Aya) I hoped to spare you, but…

There’s no choice. Let’s go see her

Will you stick with it? I may wonder

If you ever will learn when you should give up

[2:25] (Hatate) Pathetic. You won’t scare me. The “Threats” of today

Ended up to be empty

(Aya) Oh, trust me. This one’s real

(Hatate) Sure it is. I’ll call your bluff. Let’s go to your source, that is enough

(Aya) Well, we’ll go if that is how you feel

Youkai Modern Colony

[0:20] (Aya) Come on, it’s only some water here

Don’t tell me you give up now, it’s just a tiny swim

(Hatate) That’s why my power’s better. I can take pictures without going all the way in

-With the Kappa-

[0:33] (Aya) Aya. I’m here to see Nitori

(Kappa) And her?

(Aya) My assistant. She’ll be coming with me

(Hatate) Assistant! As if! I will be coming in to get my hands on her new story

-inside-

[0:46] (Nitori) Aya. Come in!... I don’t think I’ve seen you before

(Aya) Just ignore her. So then, you invited me here for a tour?

[1:00] (Nitori) Oh, right. This way. By the way, do you want a snack?

(Hatate) Well, if you don’t mind, yes

(Nitori) Alright then, I will be right back

[1:12] (Aya) You’re too naïve.

(Hatate) Unlike you, the Kappa’s polite

(Aya) Only after you pay

(Hatate) Wait a second…

(Nitori) Well, Aya’s right

[2:17] (Aya) So, what’s this then?

(Nitori) Oh, my secret weapon. Don’t ask

By the way, I noticed that your phone needs a new case and screen glass

(Hatate) For a price, right?

(Nitori) Naturally, there will be a fee

But with my new upgrades, you will never have to worry!

[2:44] (Hatate) Well, you can see how the future grows as we speak

Tell me Aya, when will you trade in that worthless antique?

The Mystery in Your Town

-In Human Village-

[0:00] (Aya) Huh. You’re late. Don’t tell me you got lost on the way down here?

(Hatate) Don’t get too cocky. Humans aren’t worth the time you know

[0:14] (Aya) Oh really? As expected of a novice reporter

There’s always something to see with humans in Gensokyo

[0:26] Oh hello there, Sanae Kochiya!

I was by your shrine earlier!

-Sanae enters-

[0:33] (Sanae) Hello! Please tell me something hasn’t happened again

(Aya) No, no, just stopped by for a quick picture-taking

(Sanae) Alright, so I guess you’re here for something similar

Oh, and who is this?

[0:45] (Aya) This is-

(Hatate) Hatate Himekaidou, Aya’s better

(Aya) What’s that? Don’t you know you should defer to your seniors?

(Hatate) Nope. So I’ll be taking a picture too

-Hatate pulls out cellphone-

[1:11] (Sanae) What’s that? It’s been a while since I saw modern cell phones!

(Hatate) This is the future that some people cannot embrace

(Aya) More like a tool for those who don’t know their place

-after pictures-

[1:39] (Hatate) Point for me. The age of physical photos is over

You should trade that box in before you go under, Aya

[1:50] (Aya) Not so fast. The quality of the shutter’s important

Your lazy power means your stories are you biggest flaw!

[2:03] (Hatate) Hah, stories are also so meaningless

A picture is all that’s needed!

(Aya) Nonsense! The purpose of articles is to describe!

It’s with language that a story’s story will thrive

(Hatate) As if. Words are only for space and looks

[2:23] (Aya) It’s sad, the level of your delusions and fancies

(Hatate) Not bad. You bored me, and it wasn’t even wordy

(Aya) Well then, I suppose that is that. Let’s go

-headed to Youkai mountain-

[2:50] (Hatate) So, what? You’ve given up and headed home already?

(Aya) Of course not. I have an appointment up on the mountain

Oh, right. Is that piece of junk waterproof?

[3:15] (Hatate) You don’t mean…

(Aya) The Kappa are underwater, of course

This baby’s waterproof and the sides are reinforced

Cheap plastic won’t get you far if you’re shooting in the field

If you ask nicely, I’m sure I can get you a deal

Newshound

-Near  Youkai Mountain-

[0:07] (Aya) That’s it for Marisa. Better put these away

And this roll right here’s for everyone else out today!

[0:12] Time to find some subjects. So who might be shooting?

Well, besides me of course. That’s what I’m always doing

-snaps pictures-

-Hatate enters-

[0:28] Augh, what’s with this picture? Did I set the brightness

too high for Marisa? Better lower it

(Hatate) That’s as far as you go! Since I made it out here

(Aya) Hey, aren’t you that one… huh, I guess I forget

[0:40] (Hatate) Well for your info, I’m from the Kakashi Report

(Aya) Oh, that delusional puny column?

(Hatate) Puny newspaper? That arrogance ends today!

I declare war on you! I’ll make you pay!

-Both exit-

-Nearby-

[1:24] (Aya) Oh, so you’re still around? I thought you went back home

(Hatate) It’s a serious challenge! I’m gathering material

(Aya) You just realized that now? That’s part of reporting

(Hatate) Your subjects are good, but your content’s horrible!

[1:30] (Aya) Stealing my subjects? I can’t let that

Happen. Go find other Youkai!

(Hatate) They’re free to take. So the best shots

Well prove the best reporter is I!

[1:47] (Aya) Hmph, Fledgling! Watch my photography and be awed!

(Hatate) I’ll eat your newspaper and win this year!

(Aya) You’re too young to do it. I guess it can’t be helped

I’ll go all out now and crush you right here!

They Need a Leader (A Touhou parody of "I Need a Hero" by Bonnie Tyler ft Miko Toyosatomimi)

Where have all the statesmen gone and where are all the kings?

Where’s the wizened councilor who’s waiting in the wings?

Common folk are useless when it comes to self rule

There’s nothing more dangerous than following a ruler who’s a fool!

They need a leader! They need a leader to guide them through the day and the night

Someone who is cool, and someone who will last, and someone who can handle a fight

They need a leader! They need a good leader to tell them wrong from right

Someone who is just and someone who can lead and someone who has eternal life!

Eternal life…

I will take the reins and rule until I’m overthrown

That will be a clear sign that society can rule on their own

I’m not too invested if they can save themselves

I’ll be an administrator only if there’s no one else

They need a leader. They need a strong leader to save them from Youkai

Though the race lives on, though their heroes are strong, it’s not enough for those who can’t fight

A human leader may be enough if they can protect those with their might

But if there’s no one, then I guess my mission is to get someone to step up, right?

They need a leader! They need a strong leader to guide them through the night

The Tao is the path to the truth, nothing more. Good and evil come equally

I was Buddhist only as long as it could serve me

I could choose to rule people again

But I’m no teacher

I don’t need new disciples like some others

They need a leader! They need a leader to guide them through the day and the night

Someone who is cool, and someone who will last, and someone who can handle a fight

They need a leader! They need a good leader to tell them wrong from right

Someone who is just and someone who can lead and someone who has eternal life!

They need a leader! They need a strong leader to save them from Youkai

Though the race lives on, though their heroes are strong, it’s not enough for those who can’t fight

A human leader may be enough if they can protect those with their might

But if there’s no one, then I guess my mission is to get someone to step up, right?

They need a leader. A leader is needed to safeguard human life…

Style (A Touhou Parody of "Style" by Taylor Swift, ft Reimu and Marisa)

(Marisa) Reimu! Borrowed this from Kourin, it’s new!

(Reimu) I told you that stuff doesn’t interest me. Don’t care

(Marisa) But it says that you can judge people by what clothes they wear

(Reimu) Well, if what that says is true, then what

Do all the clothes that they all wear say?

Let’s take a look at Sanae…

She’s got that Outside Shrine Maiden uniform

(Marisa) I don’t get how you guys can wear that and keep warm

At least that the sleeves cut off seems to be a real norm

I guess that is a “Good Girl” style

That is from her “Good Girl” style

She’s got that Frog-Dress, Eye-Hat, and long sleeve shirt

And she’s got a mirror and ropes above her long skirt

(Reimu) I’d say it’s an act just for faith, but it couldn’t hurt

That is the Moriya Shrine style

(Marisa) It’s part of a weird shrine style

(Reimu) Maybe so, but let’s look all over Gensokyo

Look at those on the mountain, what about their clothes?

(Marisa) Okay, I guess that next we’ll look at the Kappa and the Crow Tengu…

Give me a few…

I guess we’ll start here with Nitori

She wears the same outfit daily

And then the Crow Tengu’s designs…

Well she’s got a backpack, wisp hat and pocket-dress

It’s blue and has a criss-cross key over her chest

With waders even though the Kappa swim the best

What in the world is that style? I guess it’s the kappa style

They’ve both got dress shirts, short skirts, and a tokin

One clicks a shutter, the other flips up a screen

They both wear geta, but still have the fastest flight speed

What’s up with that tengu style? A business-look tengu style?

(Reimu) Alright, who’s next?

(Marisa) Ooh! Let’s do them! The SDM!

They’ve got a French maid, jamies, and Chinese dress

Don’t get me started with Flandre’s wings and the rest

And Remi wears pink because when she eats, it’s mess

(Reimu) What in the hell’s with their style? You can’t read them by their style!

Animals (A Touhou Parody of "Animals" By Maroon 5, ft Dance of Bird and Beast and the Youkai Grassroots Community)

Baby, we’re playing for you tonight

Gonna sing with all our might

Cuz we’re animals, animals, we’re animals, mals

Even if you’re staying inside

You can hear our sound for miles

Cuz we’re animals, animals, we’re animals, mals

Baby I’m-

(Mystia) So here’s the Dance of Bird and Beast

It doesn’t matter with enemies

But we get along when we’re all in tune~

(Wakasagihime) But you tried to bite into me

(Kagerou) It was a big mistake! Sorry!

(Kyouko) It doesn’t matter when we are all through

(Ran) We got permission from Yukari

(Chen) We got to play here at this party

(Aya) It’s a scoop, but it’s too noisy

(Hatate) Why did you think this would help me?

(Aya) I didn’t think they’d make so much sound

But look, photo-ops all around!

Don’t you think that’s more interesting?

(Hatate) Uh, no…

Baby, we’re playing for you tonight

We’ll play Punk Rock Sound for life

Cuz we’re animals, animals, just animals, mals

Sweeping the steps in front of shrines

Getting chased around for miles

We’re just animals, animals, we’re animals, mals

One more time!

(Kyouko) A Dharma chant is not enough

It just feels like I’m in a rut

I wanna do what I wanna do~

(Mystia) My lamprey eel is eaten up

But still that ghost is never stuffed

And all she does is eat all my food~

Do you know how hard that is for me?

It’d be easier by the sea

“Why don’t you make Yakitori?

I’m sure it would be so tasty”

(Kyouko) And people complain about my sound

When I do my thing, it bounces round

It makes sutras sound more hardy

But no-

Baby, we’re praying for you tonight

Feed you my sparrow rice wine

Cuz we’re animals, animals, just animals, mals

It makes your body feel so light

Makes you sing and dance all night

Just like animals, animals, like animals, mals

Baby I’m-

Sing songs all night, i-i-ight

You can’t deny-y-y-y

That this sounds right-i-i-ight

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Echoes of mine-i-i-ine

Are by design-i-i-ign

For beasts outside-i-i-ide

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

Yo...
Whoa...
Whoa...
Just like animals, animals, like animals-mals
Just like animals (yeah...), animals (yeah...), like animals-mals (yeah...)
Ow

Baby, we’re playing for you tonight

We’ll play Punk Rock Sound for life

Cuz we’re animals, animals, just animals, mals

Sweeping the steps in front of shrines

Getting chased around for miles

We’re just animals, animals, we’re animals, mals

One more time!

Sing songs all night, i-i-ight

You can’t deny-y-y-y

That this sounds right-i-i-ight

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Echoes of mine-i-i-ine

Are by design-i-i-ign

For beasts outside-i-i-ide

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

Part of This World (A Touhou Parody of "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid, ft. Maribel and Renko)

“Hurry Merry! Come look at this!

A Miracle Mallet that can’t exist

Does it work when you swing it? Wait, is says ‘For Inchlings’.”

“We should go back. Something feels weird.

Oh wait, but of course the door’s disappeared.”

“Well that’s that. Let’s keep going. It’s time for some exploring

Is this a museum or an art gallery?

There are pictures and pieces galore!”

“And boundaries. I count 20.”

“Well who cares? No big deal. Let’s explore!

Look at this stuff, it’s all mythical!

Gubraithian Fire? ‘This is everlasting’!”

“It says ‘The Torch of Olympia’.”

“Does it? Neat!”

“Hey look at this, I can see the stars!

So then Renko, do your date and time thing.”

“I don’t think I can. It’s… well, incomplete.”

“Looking mirrors?” “A magic wand!

‘Varumastra’? Hey, what does that mean?”

“How should I know?” “Well, isn’t this part of your dream?

Hey, um, Merry? This says this is the Kusanagi.

Then that means these places are for the other two…

If they’re empty, then could it be that everything here’s a real treasure?”

“Impossible… but I don’t know. Can it be true?”

“And Totsuka, Orna, they’re all famous swords.

Caliburn… that’s from the Arthur Legend.”

“Ignore that Renko. The hallway here’s full of spears.

It’s Longinus.” “That one from Rome?”

“Oh no! Let’s escape! We’re not alone!”

…

“So it’s Merry. One day you’ll be part of this world.”

A Huge Shadow and a Tiny Conclusion

-In the bamboo forest-

[0:36] (Mukou) So, did you hear about “Hisou Tensoku”

(Kaguya) Oh, that shadow that scared some people back then?

(Mukou) Turns out it’s a big advertisement for

That big shrine for the lake up on the mountain

-At the shrine-

[1:20] (Alice) So then I heard from the firefly Youkai

There is a giant in the woods

(Reimu) I get that, but why are you testing here?

(Alice) The shrine’s ground is more clear

[1:36] (Reimu) I don’t care! If you’re moving a big doll here

People think I’m copying!

Sanae and her goddesses have that

Hisou Tensoku thing

-in the Netherworld-

[1:52] (Yukari) All aboard!

(Yuyuko) Oh, did you get a new train?

(Yukari) Well, of course! Since we now use steam!

Making do with stolen power was hard

And this way, Gensokyo remains clean

[2:08] (Yuyuko) I don’t know. It looks like it’s all hot air

(Yukari) This baby can get anywhere!

(Yuyuko) In that case, let’s go get some eel for lunch

We should hurry, before the big dinner rush!

-In the Youkai forest-

[2:24] (Mystia) What is that? A light? It’s growing bigger and brighter and-

(Yukari) Now the final stop! Eel Stand!

-By Misty Lake-

[3:01] (Nue) Hey, what’s up? You’re looking down, Ice Fairy

(Cirno) I can’t find a Daidarabotchi

(Nue) Oh, something new? Is it somewhere hidden then?

(Cirno) If I tame it, nothing’ll scare me!

[3:15] (Nue) So, are they somewhere here in Gensokyo?

(Cirno) I saw one, but it ran far away

(Nue) Well I heard that you can exit Gensokyo

If you can find the proper place

[3:29] (Cirno) As expected of me! I scared Daidarabotchi!

That means I don’t have to be scared of anything then!

(Nue) Well anyway, I should go. We think there’ll be trouble

I was looking for a place to get hold of an old friend

-Kogasa enters-

[3:58] (Cirno) I’m the best!

(Kogasa) Boo! I’m here to steal your soul!

(Cirno) Ahh! And umbrella?! Back off, or else!

(Kogaga) Oh, really? What kind of monster would do that?

You will have to defend herself!

-Mystia enters-

[4:13] (Mystia) Everyone! You’ve got to run! It’s coming!

(Yuyuko) Please come back! I want eat an eel snack!

(Youmu) I’m sure we could catch her without the train

(Yukari) Blasphemy! Steampunk all the way!

[4:27] (Neutral) Gensokyo, a land beyond all common sense

Where both fantasy and dreams change what she saw

What’s a big shadow and things still unknown

Have in common? Unthinkable Natural Law!

Our Hisou Tensoku

-At the Moriya Shrine-

[0:15] (Sanae) So, what have we all learned today?

(Suwako) Oh come on, lighten up Sanae!

(Sanae) We were told not to cause big trouble again

Or else we’d get kicked off of the mountain

[0:25] (Suwako) Hey Kanako, help me out here!

(Kanako) Maybe I won’t. This is too much fun

(Suwako) Okay, who do you think built all of that?

We needed to get help from someone

[0:37] (Kanako) Alright, the Kappa helped us out

So the Tengu don’t have a problem

(Sanae) So that means you asked first?

And I guess it’s the same for that Hell Raven?

[0:54] (Suwako) Well, uh… not exactly

(Kanako) Hey, she came up with me

And was asking about the Yagarasu

Since I fed it to her, I thought she should owe me

So I gave her something only she could do

(Sanae) Won’t that one Satori learn that she’s missing?

(Kanako) I figured that she would go home herself

(Utsuho) I don’t know where it is. Orin’s better at that

(Sanae) What do we do with her?

(Suwako) This raven’s something else

-In the Youkai Forest-

[1:30] (Cirno) And I found this giant Youkai!

(Wriggle) Ooh, was it a Daidarabotchi?

(Cirno) No, this one wasn’t big enough

Anyway, it tried to attack me!

[1:42] (Rumia) Well, did you freeze it after that?

(Cirno) No, the stupid thing just wouldn’t give up

I know I would have beaten it anyway

But that big thing was actually tough

[1:52] (Daiyousei) So then, what did that thing look like?

(Cirno) It had these giant claws that looked like swords!

(Mystia) That’s scary! Where is it?

(Cirno) I fought it out in the forest!

[2:09] (Mystia) I’m not going in there! It could be anywhere!

(Cirno) Good idea. Someone like you’d lose instantly

(Wriggle) Well, I’ll try to find it. We should warn everyone

In the forest that that thing’s running free

[2:21] I’ll go tell Marisa and the doll magician

Daiyousei, can you tell Reimu at the shrine?

(Cirno) Come on guys, I’ll beat it the next time I see it

It is just a weakling! Everything will be fine

-At the SDM-

[3:01] (Patchouli) “The Legend of the Scarlet Wall”? What is the gatekeeper up to with this?

(Sakuya) Well, I should bring her in

(Patchouli) “Feel the Strength of my Taichi Fist!”?

-Marisa enters-

[3:18] She’s been reading too much manga in her spare time

Though I’m loathe to do so, I’ll dispose of them

(Marisa) Well in that case, I’ll be taking them off your hands!

(Reimu) Marisa, get back here!

(Alice) Oh no, not again

-inside the SDM. Marisa enters-

[3:30] (Remilia) Well hello, Marisa. Where are you going?

(Marisa) Off to steal the manga Patchy doesn’t want!

(Remilia) No, I don’t think you will. I’m not finished with them

You will not get past me

(Marisa) Oh year? Bring it on then!

-Reimu and Alice enter. Sakuya, Patchouli, Flandre and Meiling enter-

[3:44] (Reimu) Marisa, you’re cornered! Stand aside, vampire!

(Remilia) I think not. This time, she has gone too far

(Alice) Further than ice fairies? Because that was a mess

(Marisa) Well, you’re all to slow… so eat my [Blazing Star]!

(Remilia) Sakuya, after her!

(Sakuya) Flandre, please watch Meiling

(Patchouli) Idiots. Don’t disturb me in the library

(Remilia) I’m afraid it’s too late. You have drawn a bad fate

Marisa turned rightward, so they’re fighting there, Patchy.

Timeline
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