Friday, June 5, 2015

Dear Sumireko (A Touhou Parody of "Dear Future Husband" by Meghan Trainor)

Dear Sumireko, here are a few things you should know if
You want to get along in Gensokyo, alright?

Spell cards are the way to enjoy the game
But that doesn't mean our bullets are all made the same
Even if we all fight, the battle's in good fun
Why use a gun? A real 3-D gun?

You may know how to fly, but can you win a fight?
So don't be thinking you'll bring down the barrier, alright?
Those balls of yours are cool, and their power is new
Bring them to me, bring-bring them to me

Your "plan" is kinda an everyday thing
So no need to act so crazy
Now let's get to it and fight

Dear Sumireko, here are some things we feel you should know
Since you might be stuck in Gensokyo all your life

Look out for Youkai. Not all are peaceful and you'll survive
Much longer if you try to stay indoors at night

After every fight, just apologize. Everyone but Yukari will accept it alright
She's kinda pissed at you. There's not much you can do
Tread carefully, REALLY carefully

Mayhap with groveling she'd be moved to spare thee
Well, that's a solid "Maybe"
I'm sure you'll be alright

Dear Sumireko, we just met but soon you'll have to go
Don't say that! If she's threatened, I'll stand up and fight!
She's joking, Mukou. Marisa messes around, you know
If Yukari was mad, you'd have been killed last night

So, how did you get all the rumors spread?
You came over before with a few near misses
Hey, it will be alright. Try not to pick a fight
Stop panicking, stop-stop panicking

Miko's figuring out how to get you back home
So there's really no reason to... You know
Suicide is not alright

Hey Sumireko, clean up the orbs before you go
People keep getting thrown outside and starting fights
So Sumireko, here are a few things that you should know
Outside humans should never be permitted in
Sumireko, never do this again

No comments:

Post a Comment